Find balance between work, life

Kaity Holtman

These days, it seems like the most common response to the question “how are you?,” is “busy.”

In fact, “busy” gets used to so much, that it is losing its value.

We’re all busy.

Either busier than we want to be, or as busy as we choose to be.

My great grandma used to tell me that the older she got, the faster the days went. I always thought that was funny considering she was in her 90s and stayed home the majority of the time. But she kept her time occupied keeping up with family through visits and phone calls, keeping her house immaculate, and doing crafts.

She kept herself as busy as she wanted to be to continue to feel purposeful and productive.

I’m starting to see a lot of truth in what she said, though, about days going faster the older we get.

When I was in high school, I often wanted time to speed up so I could grow up and move on with life.

But the best memories I have are the times on gravel roads, in friends’ cars, with the radio up and the windows down.

Time stood still in those moments.

In fact, it’s amazing to me that I spent so much time doing much of the same thing, but one simple song can take me back to such a specific moment in time, with certain people, in a certain car.

The same is the case with many moments of my college days, at tailgates, friends’ couches, or frequented establishments, even certain places or moments on campus.

Why is that the case? I would guess it was because, whether we realized it or not, we were taking time to stop and smell the roses. We were allowing time to stand still, and we were taking it in for all that it was, and nothing more.

As we settle into adulthood – homeowners, bill payers, parents, career people – we quit doing that somewhere along the way.

It’s always on to the next thing. We make less time for friends and hobbies because our jobs and volunteerism and family responsibilities take over every minute of our time.

I am even guilty about dreading “fun” things because they become one more thing to put on our to-do lists.

Slow downtime becomes something we all crave but don’t necessarily prioritize.

When I rock Sam at nighttime, I sit in my recliner that we bought just before he was born, and I worry that I can’t remember every moment of when he was a newborn.

It’s in those moments that I wish I could just capture a mental picture that will never leave my mind.

I think about how in a couple months, that recliner will be sitting in the new house, and in a couple more months, I’ll be rocking another baby.

And maybe then, when I’m in a new place and not sitting where I have for the last year and a half, memories of this home will come to my mind more easily.

Maybe we have to move on for those precious memories to more easily surface.

I sit here and think back to a moment from just last week that I’m sure I could never forget, when Matt and I sat on the floor and just played with Sam. We laughed and had the best time, all three of us, without thinking about everything we have going on.

I just pray that the memory of that moment comes to me again when I need it.

But do we make enough of an effort to collect those moments? Or are we always moving on to the next moment?

Where and how do we find balance between being productive members of society and becoming overworked and overwhelmed to a point where we don’t take time to enjoy life?

I know that generations before mine worked their tails off, but I’ve also heard members of those generations say that they wish they would have spent more time with their families.

Or they give advice to slow down and not always be in such a rush.

There is a balance, and for each person it’s different. But I think it’s important to find that balance.

Do we want to get to the end of our lives and wish we’d made more time for life’s slow moments?

Do we want to regret missing out on taking time to drink coffee and reflect?

Do we want to miss our children growing inch by inch?

Or do we want to look back and feel like we made time for the important things, people, events, moments in our lives?

I suppose that’s open to interpretation, but for me, I absolutely want to find balance between working hard prioritizing life’s most enjoyable moments.

For it’s in those moments that I see God’s work in action. It’s in those moments that I see God’s plan for me. It’s because I notice those moments that I can truly make a difference in the lives of those around me.

Kaity Holtman is the Agriculture Editor for the Maryville Daily Forum.