Why is having grace difficult sometimes?

Kaity Holtman

To me, the word, “grace,” encompasses forgiveness, kindness, understanding, humility, and compassion.

I think of the word grace when I think of certain friends or family members who carry themselves in such a peaceful yet confident way.

Grace is calming and comforting.

Grace comes with a smile that believes everything will be okay.

Grace makes others feel safe and important at the same moment.

My goodness, doesn’t grace sound like something we all want?

Why, then, can it be so hard to exhibit grace?

Now, I know that many of the statements above are not the actual definition of grace.

But those are the descriptions that come to me when I think of specific people who exude grace.

And my definitions are also what comes to my mind when I think of God’s grace.

Ephesians 2:8-10 tells us that “For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith — and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God — not by works, so that no one can boast. For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.”

By the grace of God, we have a shot at eternal life in Heaven. Wow.

Now God made us in His image, right?

(The answer is yes — So God created mankind in his own image, in the image of God he created them; male and female he created them – Genesis 1:27)

That means that we are not only capable, but actually made, to exude the characteristics of God — grace, kindness, compassion, forgiveness, and so much more.

So if God can offer us such abundant grace that He can save us to Heaven after all the senseless decisions we make on our own, should it really be that hard for us to forgive others in such a way?

I mean, come on. We all sin, we all make bad decisions.

We’re human, that’s what we do because this world is full of temptations. And all we have to do is ask forgiveness, and God’s grace wraps us in love and understanding, but we can’t say we’re sorry or accept apologies with our loved ones for what is often so much less — usually because we’re just too proud.

Doesn’t that just sound ridiculous?

If God saves people of all walks of life, colors, income levels, genders, and more, why in the world is it so hard not to judge others for our minor differences that God Himself created?

If God can calm and comfort us in the most difficult times of our lives, why can we not make the extra effort to be there for those who need us?

I’m not counting myself out on this, either.

I catch myself way too often judging others for their choice of clothing, or decisions they make.

Why does it even matter to me? All I’m called to do is to be kind to them, in the way God called me to do.

A sin is a sin. It’s not our job to decide whose sins are worse or better than the next person’s.

We’re called to “do unto others as we would have done unto us.” I mean it’s so simple that we teach the concept to young children as a foundation for good character.

But we have to remember that even when others don’t “do unto us” as we think they should, that we have to forgive their mistakes even when it’s difficult, because that’s how we mirror God’s grace.

It’s a simple idea, but a daily challenge for me, and many, I think.

I’m challenging myself to exude grace more often. You’re welcome to join me.

We might just spread grace to others in the process.