Bernie bought a house

LARRY ANDERSON
Larry Anderson

I didn’t mind Bernie Sanders when he was galloping down the campaign trail like the Headless Horseman, pestering mightily She Who Does No Wrong. I just took him to be the gasbag he is.

Bernie was personable enough, even though the image projected was that of a mortician gone to seed.

I tried not to chuckle at ol’ Bern when he talked about his revolution and the ills of capitalism, but I never thought of him as potent as She Who Can’t Tell the Truth. At least he seemed sincere.

As you know, Bern faded quicker than the closing credits of a Charlie Chaplin movie once She Who Feels Entitled grabbed the nomination. Sad somewhat. Bernie, at 74, is a political goner.

I expected Bernie to retire to a one-room apartment to live Leninesque with a measly cot, a cold water tap, and a cracked teapot, but, alas, Bernie revealed there is less to his sense of balance than presented.

Bernie bought a house!

Not just any house, mind you. Bernie and wife Jane purchased an 1,800 square foot property on Lake Champlain. It is four bedroom with a mountain view and 500 feet of beach front.

Mr. and Mrs. Sanders paid $575,000 for the house which is roomy and comfortable but hardly comparable to the luxury to which She Who Is Worth Tens of Millions is accustomed.

Did Mr. and Mrs. Bernie do something wrong?

Hardly. In America one gets to buy a house if one wants. Or two. America isn’t the Cuba of Bernie‘s ambition for others.

Bernie isn’t loaded like She Who Lives Like Royalty. His disclosed wealth is somewhere betwixt $194,026–$741,03, which is nice but not startling. He and Jane own two other abodes, one in Burlington, Vermont, the other in Washington, D.C., and he has what is surely a lucrative book deal for Our Revolution: A Future to Believe In, soon to be released on a susceptible public.

Word is Mrs. Bernie sold a family vacation home to her brother for $150,000, thereby providing some of the capital necessary to pay cash for the new house. Also, when Jane’s tenure as president of Burlington College ended, her severance package was in the neighborhood of $200,000.

So! Add it all up with tongue in cheek, and surely the Sanders could afford a retirement cabin on the lake.

There is one teensy-weensy problem with Bernie’s house, however: It gives an inconvenient insight into the peculiar workings of the Leftist mind.

You see, Bernie, who describes himself as a Democratic-Socialist (or vice-versa) spent months on the trail explaining to loafers, millenials, and tweeters why America is soooooo bad. It had to do with the unfair distribution of wealth, Reaganomics, and evil, evil Wall Street.

Bernie’s idea is income inequality makes people feel bad and causes them to go to pot. Only a righteous government intent on sameness could fix the situation; indeed, there must be a new system designed by someone who gets it.

That and free stuff provided by productive people taxed to the max. Bernie would teach them all a lesson about how wrong it is to be inventive and hardworking.

Flocks of slackers bought the message. Sanders became god-like before failing to that pantsuited goddess of liberal righteousness.

Then Bernie bought a house like a one-percenter.

A rustic domain that spoke to reward, wealth, success, and pleasure.

A capitalist’s house. A house most commoners can’t afford as a first home, let alone a third one. A house bought as an investment and for security, sure signs of capitalistic intent.

A house of hypocrisy.

You see, folks, to Bernie it is fine for any liberal politician to own a house of ill refute because their hearts are good and their intentions noble. They deserve a little extra because they care so much.

It doesn’t matter if they sink the economic ship as long as their purpose is forthright.

It is dead wrong, however, for a businessman, industrialist, or banker to make a good living because that is surely done on the backs of their long-suffering victims.

Indeed, if your intention is profit, you are a bad person, because profit itself is bad. It isn’t capitalism that creates entrepreneurship, wealth, and security, but politicians like Bernie and She Who Will Raise Our Taxes, we are assured with empathy and sadness.

Besides, where does it say that politics shouldn’t pay big time, even for a little ol‘ man headed off to the woods?

Even for a bleeding heart liberal, so stoutly not a capitalist.