Pearls: Decency in our discussions
EDITORIAL MUG: Matt Pearl
My hope over the past several years has been that this column feels like a weekly talk with friends. Some of you reading I know well, others perhaps only by acquaintance, or not at all. I like people, and I like this corner of Missouri. I feel like I understand folks, and my desire has been for you to know me through the pieces I write.
I write what I know. I have always possessed a decent ability to read about a subject and walk away with at least somewhat of an understanding about the topic. But just because I am able to learn or to opine regarding a political subject, for example, doesn’t mean the practice gives me much personal fulfillment.
When I took over operations at The Tri-County News (five years before my wife and I acquired The Albany Ledger), I continued my father’s practice of writing a Page 2 opinion column, but soon learned that his insights into politics and society did not match my own interests. I get political at times, but I receive far greater joy from writing about family, school and other little observations or absurdities that I feel my readers might share with me.
What can I say? I’ve shared with you before that I’m not Trump-y enough for some folks, but too conservative for the rest. From private conversations I’ve had with quite a few people around the area, I know I’m not alone. My point: nobody is right all the time, so the expectation that each of us conform completely to the red side or the blue is ridiculous. Trump is imperfect, as were each of his predecessors, as will be his successor.
If you agree with anyone in this world 100 percent of the time, I will first question your integrity, and then I’ll question your intellect.
Lest I sound self-indulgent, dedicating a column to you about how I write my column and expecting you to take interest in such an offering, I’ll move to the next subject. Or, rather, get back to the original subject.
Talking with good folks is one of my favorite diversions from the repetitiveness of my days. Getting around the table with my wife and kids, though it becomes rarer as they grow older and have more commitments, remains some of my favorite moments in this life.
When one of you catches me and has something – positive or negative – to say about what I have written, and we can chat and part with well wishes, I call that communicating. The world outside has forgotten how to disagree, but that doesn’t mean that you and I should let it go here in rural America.
I would prefer to disagree with a good person over a cup of coffee to having agreements and likes from random strangers and bots online. Nobody grows, nobody thinks, nobody benefits when we anonymously agree (or disagree) with one another. And even when our online replies and remarks are not anonymous, many of us find ourselves speaking with far more ‘courage’ and far fewer manners when posting online.
There are issues for which I feel 100 percent certainty that I am correct in my thinking. You’re not changing my mind on these, nor does it cause me any great personal distress if you hold a different perspective from mine.
But I have to say that the longer I live, the less I really believe that people in some golden time now past once shared all their beliefs and ideas kindly and fairly, and that they never argued over politics, or that respectful language was once the standard. How did we get two parties if people never voiced their disagreements? Our country fought a civil, for crying out loud.
No, I’ll not allude to some fictional, utopian past where everyone used to get along. We all should know better. But I will say that decency in your discussions, especially with the folks you have to see day in and day out, might be a better option than Facebook feuding over politics.
Matt Pearl owns and operates The Tri-County Ledger.
